::靜夜思::

替我愛你

就因為發現你眼底　閃動為我牽掛的猶豫
這些日子為你亂的心　忽然全都釋懷平靜
關於她不完全怪你　是我大意讓她靠近你
對愛情自己是太自信　失敗了　我輸得起

過去　已經過去　眼前　你要珍惜　Ham~~如果她願意

替我愛你　就讓她替我跟你鬥嘴鬧情緒
聽你說她很細心　善解人意　她真的比我更適合你
讓她愛你　就讓她替我陪你熱鬧或孤寂
抱歉的話別再提　就到這裡　我真心願意讓她替我愛你

作詞：黃祖蔭　作曲：Tommy Wu　編曲：屠穎　演唱：田馥甄Hebe

龍應台－明白

2007年8月25日星期六

昨天在聯合早報上讀到台灣作家龍應台的一篇文章,覺得感觸很深. 我們在年輕時常常抱怨母親不了解我們的煩惱,卻忘了母親也曾年輕過,也曾受過生命的種種折磨. 這篇文章, 使我更能體諒母親.

與大家共勉之.

====== 我是分格線 ======

龍應台－明白
二十歲的時候，我們的媽媽們五十歲。我們是怎麼談她們的？

　　我和麗茹在一個浴足館按摩，並排懶坐，有一句沒一句地閑聊。一面落地大窗，外面看不進來，我們卻可以把過路的人看個清楚。這是上海，這是衡山路。每─個亞洲城市都曾經有過這麼一條路──餐廳特別時髦，酒吧特別昂貴，時裝店冷氣極強，燈光特別亮；牆上的海報一定有英文或法文寫的“米蘭”或“巴黎”。最突出的是走在街上的女郎，不管是露著白皙的腿還是纖細的腰，不管是小男生樣的短發配牛仔褲還是随風飄起的長發配透明的絲巾，一颦一笑之間都輻射著美的自覺。每一個經過這面大窗的女郎，即使是獨自一人，都帶著一種演出的神情和姿態，美美地走過。她們在愛戀自己的青春。

　　麗茹說，我記得啊，我媽管我管得煩死了，從我上小學開始，她就怕我出門被強奸，到了二十幾歲還不準我超過十二點回家，每次晚回來她都一定要等門，然後也不開口說話，就是要讓你“良心發現，自覺慚愧”。我媽簡直就是個道德警察。

　　我說，我也記得啊，我媽給我印象最深的就是她的“放肆”。那時在美國電影上看見演“母親”的講話輕聲細氣的，渾身是優雅“教養”。我想，我媽也是杭州的綢緞莊大小姐，怎麼這麼“豪氣”啊？當然，逃難，還生四個小孩，管小孩吃喝拉撒睡的日子，人怎麼細得起來？她講話聲音大，和鄰居們講到高興時，會笑得前仰後阖，會笑得彎腰一直拍打自己的腿，笑到不行。總而言之，我媽一直是個豪放女。

　　現在，我們自己五十多歲了，媽媽們成了八十多歲的“老媪”。

　　“你媽時光會錯亂嗎？”她問。

　　會啊，我說，譬如有一次帶她到鄉下看風景，她很興奮，一路上說個不停：“這條路走下去轉個彎就是我家的地”，或者說，“你看你看，那個山頭我常去收租，就是那里。”我就對她說，“媽，這里你沒來過啦。”她就開罵了：“亂講，我就住在這里，我家就在那山谷里，那里還有條河，叫新安江。”

　　我才明白，這一片台灣的美麗山林，仿佛浙江，使她忽然時光轉換回到了自己的童年。她的眼睛發光，孩子似的指著車窗外，“佃農在我家地上種了很多楊梅、桃子，我爸爸讓我去收租，佃農都對我很好，給我一大堆果子帶走，我還爬很高的樹呢。
”
　　“你今年幾歲，媽？”我輕聲問她。

她眼神茫然，想了好一會兒，然後很小聲地說，“我……我媽呢？我要找我媽。”　　麗茹的母親住在北京一家安養院里。“開始的時候，她老說有人打她，剃她頭發，聽得我糊塗──這個安養院很有品質，怎麼會有人打她？”麗茹的表情有點憂郁，“後來我才弄明白，原來她回到了文革時期。年輕的時候，她是工廠里的出納，被拖出去打，讓她洗廁所，把她剃成陰陽頭──總之，就是對人極盡的污辱。”

　　在你最衰弱的時候，卻回到了最暴力、最恐怖的世界──我看著沉默的麗茹，“那……你怎麼辦？”

　　麗茹說，“想了好久，後來想出一個辦法。我自己寫了個證明書，就寫‘某某人工作努力，態度良好，愛國愛黨，是本廠優良職工，已經被平反，恢複一切待遇。’然後還刻了一個好大的章，叫什麼什麼委員會，蓋在證明書上。告訴看護說，媽媽一說有人打她，就把這證書拿出來給她看。”

　　我不禁失笑，怎麼我們這些五十歲的女人都在做一樣的事啊。我媽每天都在數她錢包里的鈔票，每天都邊數邊說“我沒錢，我的錢到哪里去了。”我們跟她解釋說她的錢在銀行里，她就用那種懷疑的眼光盯著你看，然後還是時時刻刻緊抓著錢包，焦慮萬分。怎麼辦？我于是打了一個“銀行證明”：“茲證明某某女士在本行存有五百萬元整”，然後下面蓋個方方正正的章，紅色的，連蓋好幾個，看起來很衙門，很威風。我交代印傭：“她一提到錢，你就把這證明拿出來讓她看。”我把好幾副老花眼鏡也備妥，跟“銀行證明”一起放在她床頭抽屜。錢包，塞在她枕頭下。

　　按摩完了，麗茹和我的“媽媽手記”技術交換也差不多了。落地窗前突然又出現一個年輕的女郎，寬闊飄逸的絲綢褲裙，小背心露背露肩又露腰，一副水靈靈的妖嬌模樣；她的手指一直繞著自己的發絲，帶著給別人看的淺淺的笑，款款行走。

　　從哪里來，往哪里去，心中有一分明白，月光瀉地。

<聯合早報-現在>2007年8月24日

*帶著面具的小丑下台一鞠躬*
上午10:10

MEP recording

was told to help some MEP ppl with their recording. Heard it's becoz the King is too busy to make it, so I am the closest substitute they can find. In econ terms, this is becoz the market for double bassist is small . The willingness and ability for consumers to purchase (sounds wrong..) bassist is perfectly price elastic (coz there is no price in the first place) and the supply of bassists is inelastic too. so when there's a increase in price (in terms of time), the demand for bassist will fall to zero, and consumers will turn to the closest substitute, ceteris paribus.

ok, i muz have been studying econ too much =.=

was helping Sarah on Friday. It's a very unusual experience coz i only got to see the score on the day and was asked to do a recording about it. i muz say,"I HATE RHYTHMS!!!!!!" the tempo is 100 crotchets per minute and the whole music is made up of syncopations. Though Sarah found another bassist so we can take turns to play to minimize the errors, it's still too difficult for me to sightread the piece and play it in the actual speed, with only 1 hour of practice =.=

Luckily the music sounds ok during the recording.. So scared I will play wrondly and spoilt the music. =S

Next wednesday is helping Junting. Saw her music already, quite OK for me =) was worried that the music may sounds weird coz i haven't touched the bass ever since i took the exam leave from YO....it seems i am still coping quite well =) bass hasn't forgot me, and i haven't forgot how to play bass too =D looking forward the next recording experience ^__^

*帶著面具的小丑下台一鞠躬*
上午9:54

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME ! ! !

2007年8月7日星期二

It's my birthday today [woman's age is a secret..shh~~]

The first birthday that whole school is celebrating with me [actually they are celebrating National Day]

The fist birthday that none of my parent will be celebrating with me coz they are in Taiwan now

The first birthday that i doubt there's a cake.

Going to watch movie with Ah Hua this afternoon... Ah Lin is back with Kangaroos again and Ah ma has lesson till 4.30. Guess it'll really take forever for the 5 of us to gather together again =.=

I dun really care if my classmates going to celebrate it for me or not. I doubt it actually. My best friend is not even coming to sch =.= what else can you expect.

It's ok. I shan't care abt them. At least I have Me to celebrate my birthday with me.

So, let me be the first one [probably the only one] to wish myself happy birthday =)

Happy Birthday to Me,
Happy Birthday to Me,
Happy Birthday to Shu Fang
Happy Birthday to Me.....

*帶著面具的小丑下台一鞠躬*
凌晨1:10

The Power of Your Eye

2007年8月5日星期日

Click: http://bbs.astro.qq.com/cgi-bin/bbs/show/content?groupid=147:11119&st=&sc=&messageid=41304&gpc=4&ggpc=0

You can decide the direction and the speed of the doll turning !!

I spent almost 30 minutes to figure it but my brother only took less than 5 minutes =.=

the instruction says when the doll is tuning sideway, tell you brain that the girl is lifting up the opposite leg of which she is actually lifting, then you will see her change direction!!

I can only do it if I only stare at her ankle despite my 30 minutes of trying... she won't listen to me if i look at her whole body.

My brother managed to make her turning from side to side instead of circles... amazing right ?!

Worth trying if you got nothing better to do =P

*帶著面具的小丑下台一鞠躬*
晚上11:09

.淑.芳.

Break The Silence

Your Journey Does Not End Here

Never Forget Your Thank Yous

Rewind